You can’t understand me. [I am uncomfortable.]
“Hi, how are you. I am researcher in [redacted] University and new in USA. I need girlfriend here. I can’t speak English very well and I can’t understand very well. Do not be afraid, I am only not well. You looks very beautiful and I’d like to meet you a lot. Everybody likes me in my Country. I am a romance; like beautiful flowers; going to movie with you; sightseeing together New York, museums important building; to have sex; walking together hand in hand and kissing your lips. Maybe you can notice my green eyes. But don’t kiss, you can’t understand me. I am kissing very well (girls kissed by me say me). I think you send me an e-mail too. See you…”
Submitted by L.
(Source: okcupidkillme)
image: download
...
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Him:
i am a patagonian, you are a beauty... say your 'lust is weakness'... I will satisfy it and more. Get drinks with me and I will make you smile as you provoke the enamoration inside me... beauty is fleeting, yet you seem to have it in a perverse stranglehold. I will make you laugh and smile and you will gaze at me with wonderment, thinking;where has this man been all my life... Just a shot in the dark; this message, if it finds you. I promise satisfaction and an affirmation of your existence; myself being only a reduplication of a man, albeit one who will validate your breath, make your longing legitimate... the choice is yours. And yet, none shall worry or despair upon your choice of silence and ignorance. I am but a lustful man, a feral being, seeking only beauty and understanding... Your eyes, your lips, your body... could it save me?? Only time and will can decide
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Me:
thy beams so reverend, and strong why shouldst thou think ? i could eclipse and cloud them with a wink, but that i would not lose her sight so long." pitiful creature you are, sir. pitiful indeed. are you attempting to woo with such words of indignant repugnance? oh, my dear sir, do not linger here. wanton lustful proposals are not to be indulged; for we all know beauty shall never last - "but at my back i always hear time's winged chariot hurrying near; and yonder all before us lie deserts of vast eternity." in truth, my existence need not be affirmed; rather worshiped truthfully. satisfaction? my dear boy, you cannot appease me. if i were to settle for less, such as yourself, beauty would be forgotten; foolishness would succeed. oh, no, i don't want to play with such trifles. need i elaborate for you, are you in need of a more feasible response? oh, poor child you are. had i not been forced into such revolt, by such sentiments of concupiscence, i would have enjoyed a proper discussion. scuttle off, the children are beckoning.
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Him:
haha, awesome!
Tell me more about your past failed relationships - and leave out the punctuation, please!
I am fun and outgoing. I like being around calm laid back people.
I am looking for two things one is friends and a man I can connect with, I haven’t had that in a long time and I tired of settling for less I do because I am a really nice person and if I think a guy is nice I must keep well this is not the case anymore when I say connect I mean mentally physically and have things in common the last 2 guys I was with we had nothing in common it was just a pleasant time now that is a waste of my time and his time if that’s the case let’s be friends I am 25 time to start getting what I want out of life at least I can control that.
Submission.
(Source: okcupidkillme)
I have never had sex with an Asian!!
I have never had sex with an Asian!! Your cute so HMU if Ur down I’m not a weirdo just a normal dude from la lol
Submitted by L.
(Source: okcupidkillme)
From his profile:
“Don’t add me if you are not going to chat its a waste of time or if you are already speaking to 10 other guys…”
Submitted by M.
(Source: okcupidkillme)
god. i just want to bang you all night long, while watching tv, and eating fully dressed fat cheeseburgers, as the grease rolls off my chin and drips onto your stomach, as you smoke a cigarette and slurp on grape falvored mineral water (to hydrate yourself)
-T*******
I want you to be my future ex- wife
I’d simply walk into Mordor for a date with you. The fires of Mount Doom aren’t nearly as hot as you are.
