OkCupid, Kill Me

Submitted by L:

Subject: HI!

May 26, 2010 — 3:17PM

Hi, my name is M*** and L*** i like the night life too! I love the big cities you like and i currently just got back from traveling to Europe. I have been in Europe for two weeks traveling to Switzerland, Germany, Austria, Check republic, and Italy. I went to major cities such as, Venice, Prague, and Amsterdam. Amsterdam was amazing and i wish i could live there. All the coffee shops you could ever dream of with anything you wanted on the menu. People there don’t get addicted to any drugs because they have always had them around. There was never a law against any of it, so i guess people just got tired of them. You won’t see addicts in Amsterdam and that is cool. People know the balance there; what is right and wrong. Anyway, got to head out.

Thanks, M***

Submitted by L:

The six things I could never do without:

welp

i like butts

bubble butts
petite butts
wide butts
shapely butts
taut butts
tiny butts

(_(__|

basically a rainbow of ass.

Hello lovely followers, just a few updates and fun things like that!

Regarding submissions: Please, if you submit a post, do not format them in any way. We like to keep our posts as uniform as possible, and changing your formatting just makes our jobs difficult :) Also, when submitting messages, please include the subject and the date!

Love and stuff: You guys may have noticed a decrease in posts lately, and that is because unfortunately work and other commitments have been eating away at us, and taking away from our online dating time. D: Also, one of us went and got herself a boyfriend (the lucky bitch), but we are still taking submissions and we have plenty queued up, so keep them coming!

Recommendation: If you ever have a little second of time in between tumbling, please recommend us for the Tumblr Directory! We will send you cookies!

Submitted by SG:

Subject: (no subject)

May 25, 2010 — 1:43PM

How are you doing babygirl. Damn you fine!!! Shit…I hope you don’t mind me stopping by your page but when I seen the picture I had to kiss the ring twice…lol Yea I’m married in which you probably don’t hear most guys say to you because they don’t keep it real. They would rather lie to you just so they can hit something but that’s neither here nor there. I just wanted to stop by to let you know how beautiful you look and I’m going to keep it moving before I fall in love at first sight…lol. If you ever need a friend let me know you can leave me your number is you want to and I’ll hit you up. Let me take care of you ok? Holla Back at Your man. Peace!!!

May 21, 2010 – 1:11pm

The Princess Bride is a top ten of mine! And Lost In Translation has been my life in Japan … all of it anyone will laugh at and have experienced.

I love you peasant girl swirling; do you dance for soft butch sailors on a port call?

You have a feminine elegance that I miss … that is appealing … and methinks you dance seductively.

I don’t dance at all, a cost of my being an officer, I am rigid and yes you would probably have loads of fun bringing me to speechlessness and blushing in public with ease with what I imagine you can be playfully capable of.

You are cute and more the better I sense that you have a keen sense of the tragic in life if I may guess at your disposition.

I will be stationed in ******* again north shore; is it too far and are you (or desire) monogamous and are you (in private) submissive?

T******

May 15, 2010 – 11:14pm

so i’m writing this because well, you seem like a pretty cool lady.

i also was inspired to write you because of your claim that you make people feel kind of uncomfortable. kind of curious how…oh and tho i’m not a heavy drinker i do enjoy a good scotch on occasions after a long day.

we should get to know each other…hope all’s well

c***

p.s.
maybe you can tell me why NO ONE is responding to me. we can discuss in detail if you decide to write back.

May 17, 2010 – 12:00am

yeah you have great lips. i’d love to see you smiling chewing on a straw at the bar. what drink do you drink that takes stirrers in it?

May 2, 2010 – 2:58am

Are you enough of a feminist to peg a guy? I have to admit you show some unusual traits, even for a kinky lawyer to be.

Have you had much fun on this system yet?

J***

Submitted by H:

Subject: well now…

May 17, 2010 – 1:32am

You are simply put, a bucket of insane…

Me? I’m just your run of the mill bipolar / sociopath that really only cares about occupying his time one way or another, and subverting people’s promises to themselves.

Except the other half of the time, when I’m hiding underneath beds and desperately trying to ignore anything and everything that happens around me.

I manipulate people for a living, I’ve put what was considered a defect to some good use, a market executive type. Its pretty fun.

I think we could amuse each other, I just moved here a few days ago…looking for people to keep me occupied. I can’t promise not to attempt to subvert your vow of celibacy, but I’m male and nuts so you should expect that.

Could be fun though, and I guarantee by the end of whatever happens, you really will fucking hate me.

Nice tit shot, I ‘el oh el’d.

Subject: looking for more hip-hop?

May 13, 2010 – 2:19pm

no thats not sexual innuendo or code word for interracial dating, unless you want it to be… lol

Submitted by B:

My Self-Summary
Just looking for hot chicks who wanna hook up.
Just looking for hot chicks who wanna hook up.
Just looking for hot chicks who wanna hook up.
Just looking for hot chicks who wanna hook up.
Just looking for hot chicks who wanna hook up.
Just looking for hot chicks who wanna hook up.
Just looking for hot chicks who wanna hook up.
Just looking for hot chicks who wanna hook up.
Just looking for hot chicks who wanna hook up.
Just looking for hot chicks who wanna hook up.

The most private thing I’m willing to admit here:
I would have a threesome with another guy
(OKCKM: This guy, perhaps?)

Submitted by L:

I’m looking for a woman to take me out to nice places and generally show me a good time.

I have a good relationship with my mother and great taste in shoes.

About you: you’ll be 18 - 35 years old, physically fit and attractive,
and confident enough to have your own life without a boyfriend who tells you how wonderful you are every 19 minutes.

Please do not expect me to call you every day, buy you flowers,
or generally do nice things that guys, “are supposed to do.” It’s just not me.

I don’t mind what height, hair colour or skin colour you are,
but I do ask that you are slim to average. Preferably with gym membership…That you actually use…More than once every 6 months.

Please write me why I should meet you. I am looking forward to hearing from you.

P.S. Don’t contact me if you are sexually repressed or have issues with men.

OKCKM’s response: I’d ask that your penis be at least half the size of your inflated ego(because if your personality is going to be this awful, I might as well get a good fuck out of it), that you allow me to pummel your face in with your own pathetic, misogynistic bullshit as a weapon afterwards, oh, and that you never, ever contact me. Please.

This is what my love life has been reduced to, propositions from middle-aged married couples looking to have a threesome. -___-

Subject: Hi

May 9, 2010 – 8:10pm

How are you? I just saw your page and thought I’d say hi. My wife and I were hoping to meet someone on here and thought you were totally cute. How is your weekend going? Up to anything fun? Hope all is well!

 (11:42:23 pm)nudeslutm:hi how are you tonight?

(11:42:44 pm)b********:oh hello

(11:42:54 pm)nudeslutm:what does your okc name mean?

(11:43:34 pm)nudeslutm:mine was a late night drunken attempt to be provacative

(11:44:20 pm)b*******:I know what yours means, you don’t need to tell me.

Submitted by K:

Subject: What if I never met you

What if we never fell in love….

HEY GUYS! If you like us,

please please please recommend

OKCKM for the tumblr directory!

It’s just a quick click!